Photo illustration by Seth Perry
As a faith leader in recovery, my life exists at the nexus of personal development and spiritual growth. If you read this column regularly, you’ll know that I am a recovering addict who lives well with bipolar I and that I became a pastor while in recovery. I have spent 2025 testing, deconstructing, and observing self-help modalities. One theme I encountered on this journey is the concept of being self-made.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with calling oneself self-made, but something deep within me—likely shaped by my four psychiatric hospitalizations in my twenties—believes we must be cautious whenever self-empowerment is presented as an attainable goal for absolutely everyone. Becoming self-made may not be attainable to some, especially some folks in recovery. I have seen severe mental health conditions, including substance use disorder, treated successfully through the combined support of professionals and peers. My dual diagnosis requires me to seek assistance and rely on the help of others, and this is why I identify as a community-made person.
The origin of the term self-made man has a confusing history. Physician and author John Bulwer used the term to critique how people altered their natural appearance in the 17th century. When Bulwer first used the term self-made man, it was not a positive expression. Not only does this original use not match the modern connotation of the phrase self-made, but, ironically, Bulwer himself was an aristocrat. So, we have to remember that the phrase entered the English vernacular from a man who lived off a modest inheritance, thus relying on the assets of his family.
In America, many folks will tell you that Benjamin Franklin is the prototypical self-made person. Franklin was raised by a humble candlemaker, far from the lap of luxury that some of his fellow Founding Fathers enjoyed from birth. However, there are two important factors about Franklin’s life that confirm his reliance on others to achieve success.
First, Franklin was literate in a time when many were not. The fact that he was taught to read, opened doors that otherwise would have remained closed. Second—and most importantly—Franklin owned slaves. Profiting from the labor of at least seven people completely disqualifies an individual from being self-made.
In contrast, someone who had almost no help rising to prominence was Harriet Tubman. Born a slave, she was illiterate her entire life, and she relied on intuition and ancestral knowledge of celestial navigation to guide slaves to freedom. However, Tubman could not have achieved her heroism without a community of individuals who maintained the network of the Underground Railroad. This suggests the difficulty of conceptualizing a completely self-made individual.
Addiction and mental health recovery is a delicate process that requires a community approach.In the present day, there is a divisive corner of the internet where the idea of the self-made man is fabricated by numerous individuals on social media with the intent of roping you into an online course. Luke Belmar may have popped up on your feed and made you feel insecure about your income. His brother, Nate Belmar, may have appeared on your screen while suggesting that your current diet is essentially poisoning you. Alex Hormozi probably showed up on your social media as a podcast guest, delivering an outrageous take on how many hours a day a human is built to work. There are countless variations of these influencers, each with something to sell. The irony is that their entire business model rests on convincing you that you can become self-made—just as long as you keep buying their never-ending stream of courses.
I’d love to tell you that churches are completely free of this kind of discourse, but unfortunately, numerous pastors sound a lot like personal development coaches and financial gurus. In America, there’s a standard group of top televangelists who each have their own version of the prosperity gospel. I don’t feel it’s necessary to list the usual suspects or give them any more press than they already generate for themselves. The main point is that these preachers spin God into a pathway for personal empowerment. Yet again, that pathway to wealth and influence is contingent on your financial support of their books, programs, and ministries.
When the ideologies or jargon of online gurus and prosperity preachers are parroted by newcomers in recovery circles, my heart breaks. Someone newly diagnosed with a mental health condition or just beginning their first month of addiction recovery is incredibly fragile and can adopt overly simplistic self-made philosophies. I remember back in 2010, when I got clean, how susceptible I was to outside suggestions. What worked for me was having a team of counselors, psychiatrists, support workers, and nurses who helped me build a sustainable, long-term, community-based approach to recovery. Without the support of a reputable treatment center, I could have easily wandered into the wrong church or Google search and found myself on the unsustainable pathway of self-made prosperity.
The core message of this issue’s article is probably the most important thing I will ever say in this column, and it is this: Addiction and mental health recovery is a delicate process that requires a community approach, since the needs of someone in the early stages differ greatly from those of an individual that is able to take care of their own health, finances, relationships and mental wellness. Anyone promoting the idea of the self-made person may be speaking from an experience of overcoming barriers that, while real, are not clinically severe—such as a dual diagnosis, a mood disorder, PTSD, or schizophrenia. Speaking as a person who continually manages my mental health condition and substance use disorder, I strongly believe there is a different set of rules for the game of life in my circumstances, and I choose to rely on the support of community to navigate life’s ups and downs.
In order to give you a little hope, here are the amazing possibilities that await anyone who chooses to embrace the identity of a community-made person. I can walk into a support group anywhere in the world—as I have in Portugal, France, Cuba, Canada, or more than fifteen U.S. states—and feel the immediate embrace of a caring community. There are several religions and faith communities, spanning various denominations, that serve as supportive networks for those who darken their doors. Over the past year, my journeys have allowed me to encounter nonprofit organizations that bring communities together to promote healing and growth. So, if you feel ashamed for having failed to be a self-made individual, fear not: There is another path. Look to those with their hands outstretched, inviting you into mutual support. You have the opportunity to be community-made.
For more on this subject watch this video here:
Seth Perry (he/him/his) is an ELCA pastor, mental health advocate, and creator of the documentary podcast miniseries Our Stigma, available on all platforms. Living well with Bipolar I, he speaks and writes about the intersection of faith, mental health, and recovery. Seth currently serves Elim Lutheran Church in Scandia, MN. More at www.ourstigma.com.
